I'm a stalker.

No, seriously. I'm a straight up stalker.

This one time, I only knew a guy's first name, and i spent three hours on facebook looking through pages and pages of people with his name til I found him.

Illogical? Heck to the yeah.

I didn't even really care.

Stalking people, specifically online, etc, is a way for me to pass the time.

I love it when I find out stuff about people, and no one else knows I know it. Its like a little personal victory for me. Heh heh heh.

I'm pretty into reading blogs. Not a ton of them, but a few. I like funny ones, and ones with juicy stories, like 'mormon bachelor pad' and 'hyperbole and a half.'

I dont consider any of these online people my friends, though. And I must say, I think its funny when people have e-crushes and consider people theyve never actually met in person to be their friends.

Maybe its just me, but I think thats sort of ridiculous.

Friendship is based on actually knowing a person. In my opinion this means you HAVE to have seen the person at least a few times in person, face to face. I simply don't comprehend how you can consider someone you don't know your friend.

Maybe I'm simply an insensitive, abrasive, people-hating pig. But at least I'm somewhat rational. And frankly, I'll take what I can get.

Because I like who I am and I like being that person.

So if you've got a problem with that, screw you. I love me, and thats about all that matters.

Chrimmus

This lovely year, I have raked in a pretty good haul.
Snuggie
Season 5 of LOST on DVD
New Booooootsssssss
Glee Soundtracks
etc etc.

Yay!

Baba Wawa

I was watching "The View" on Hulu tonight, when I had to go put my laundry in, so I paused it for a couple minutes. I came back, and I had to laugh and take a screen shot of the frame it was on.




Oh Barabra Walters. You will never cease to amuse me.

Is feminism dead?

Ok. So here we are. Mormon ladies living in Provo, going to BYU.

I get it. WE're typically characterized as homemakers, ohh, we love baking, and the priesthood, and boys. Sooooooooooo much.

I'll tell you something that makes me sick.

So I'm on the "relief society meeting committee," formally known as the "enrichment committee."

I like decorating cakes. Its one of the few stereotypically very feminine things I do, activity wise. I'm no expert, but I know my way around a crumb coat and a frosting tube, if you know what I mean. So when the enrichment committee leader says she wants to do a cake decorating activity, I get volunteered. I don't even mind doing it. I think its a fun thing other people could do too.

I just got an email from said leader.

Here is what it said. I will give you the general gist of it.

Basically, it was about getting organized for the activity next week, blah blah blah. but THEN, I saw a little important piece of information that I hadn't known about.

Apparently, after we, the relief society, decorate our little cupcakes, courtesy of schooling from myself and another girl, we are going to go caroling and bring them to other people.

Would you like to know who?
.....
.......
.........
We're "going caroling" to the guys apartments. We're baking boys cupcakes and singing to them.
I kid you not.

AM I THE ONLY PERSON WHO'S UPSET ABOUT THIS???????????!!!!???

Is feminism dead?!??

I get that we "love the priesthood holders" and everything. That's just fine and dandy. But I think its STUPID, I repeat, STUUUUUPID for us to go singing at their doors offering cupcakes.

Why can't we give them to people we know who've had a bad day, or maybe a nice nursing home, or even the residents of the surrounding neighborhoods?

This literally makes me feel sick to my stomach. I feel like all we're doing is perpetuating stereotypes, and pushing the image that women ought to be domestic, humble, and bake stuff for dudes all the time.

And I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATEEEEEeE that.

Just want to say.

I'm tired of hearing people criticize faith.

I'm sick and tired of having to listen to your supposedly enlightened and researched, whatever arguments that my faith is ridiculous. I'm tired of having people tell me what I believe. I know what I believe, okay? It is NOT your place to try and put words in my mouth or attempt to tell me what is right and isn't right.

I believe in free agency. That is the greatest gift we have ever been given, whether or not you believe in God. Regardless, we have it, there is no denying that, and you are completely free to say and do what you want. But STOP trying to change my opinion.

You accuse us of being "spoon fed" our beliefs. This is preposterous. I, in no way whatsoever, was spoon fed those things that I know for sure today.

Having faith in religion, in God, in Christ, does not come easily. You say that we take it as the easy way out, so we don't have to explain anything in life. Thats the most ridiculous lie. It is harder, especially in the society and world we live in today, to keep up a faith in our Heavenly Father than ever before. Everyday, people like you chastise, accuse, and belittle us because of our faith. So how is that by any means the easy, convenient way out?

I have come to determine for myself that my Heavenly Father lives, and that his Son lived and died for us. I know this better and with more firmness than anything else I have ever known or been taught in my entire life. I learned it on my terms. I didn't just automatically believe every little thing I was told as a small child. Especially as I got older, and went to college, I had to discover for myself, on my own, based on my own experiences and hardships. Oh, and don't try to tell me that you have to go through so much more than I do. Because its simply not true. Everyone has problems and issues in their life, man. Don't take the selfish route out and blame those around you instead of learning and dealing with it for yourself.

Oh, and how dare you try and take down your own close friends. They love and care for you more than anything in the world, and yet you belittle their beliefs on a regular basis. I don't know how they stand it. Have you absolutely no respect?? They LOVE you, man, and yet you still try and make them change their minds about their most fundamental beliefs by pointing out "coincidences" and "flaws" in their faith. I don't EVER see any of them trying to make you change your mind or beliefs. That's because they RESPECT you. So why can't you them?

I really hope you change your mind one day.

Even more, I hope you decide to stop trying to criticize my faith and come to realize that there is nothing you can do to shake it.

Heh.

I'm slightly amused right now.

I made it into the quotation bar on the side of mormon bachelor pad's blog.

Am I proud? eh. whatever.

Here's the thing:

I like reading their blog. It's funny, and ridiculous, and interesting. And I've always been a nosy person by nature.

The thing is, these two guys stay anonymous. Which I can respect, especially with the stuff they've been posting up there. I wouldn't want anyone to know who I was either.

However, they seem to have let popularity go to their heads with their couple hundred followers, and have discussed making t-shirts and calendars.

Seriously.

Am I the only one who sees this as completely ridiculous? This whole anonymity thing is going to be flushed down the toilet pretty soon if they keep that kind of thing up. But maybe thats what they really want. I don't know... I'm not judging, just observing.

Its a bit amusing... sometimes they seem to react more hormonally to negative criticism than some girls do on their period.

I laugh.

body fail.

Hey. Hey you. Yeah, you, KNEE.

Stop with this random pain nonsense.

I'm tired of waking up with you feeling like you've got a big fat bruise on you and not there being anything there.

No more of this crap, knee. Enough is enough. I Haven't even run on you in like, a week and a half. There is no excuse.

I am NOT old enough to have this kind of old lady pain when it gets cold. So if thats it, cut the crap.

Later.

--Erin

Flashbacks

I just saw Children of Eden performed here at BYU in the Pardoe Theatre tonight. It was intense flashback time.

I cried at the end of the first act... that song always got me when I was in the show, and it still gets me now. :)

These people are so talented... watching this show gave me chills time and time again.

Its made me really think hard. I'm reconsidering a lot of things now.

Dear People of the World.

Take note.
I don't like being called "Ern."
It is not a flattering nickname. I don't find pleasure in answering to it. I don't, really.
Ernie is a different matter. You are only allowed to call me Ernie if you are one of my younger siblings.
I mean, come on. Isn't "Erin" short enough already? Are you too lazy to pronounce both syllables? Do you have something against the letter "i?"
The vowels are offended by your poor attitude, and so am I.

So please, people of the world. I have a name. Its Erin.
If you want to come up with something better, feel free. By all means, have at it. Just make sure it fits my pimpin self, and we'll be good.

Regards,
ERIN.

Classage and whatnot.

I've been signing up for classes lately.
Still don't know what the crap I want to do with my life, but whatever.

In other news, I did sign up for the next level of tap-- Tap Dance Technique 1. I'm sort of all kinds of pumped about it. I really liked into to Tap last year, so I'm hoping I'll still like this next one and won't suck at it.
:D

I've also signed up for Astronomy and the second part of New Testament, and I'm waiting to see if I can get into a specific Spanish class so I can keep that up too.

Ode to Mr. Ryan Stewart, professor of English.

This year, I'm in a freshman english class. Don't judge me. I thought I would need it for my major... that is, until I decided in my quarter-life crisis that I don't want to do public relations anymore. So I'm stuck in this class... But its all good, since my professor is freaking HI-larious. For example.

"In the south, you can say pretty much anything you want about somebody, as long as you say 'bless their heart' with it. For example, "Trent is just stupid, Bless his heart."

"The Western Capitalist Machine... Its like a bus. And Obama drives it."

Another student: "Mr. Stewart, where's that tie from?"
Mr. Stewart: "America."

"I'll make fun of every race in this class. Especially caucasians.... Smug caucasions."

(Giving an example of a simile)
"John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds, who had also never met."

"Refried beans not in a can are sketchy, because you don't know who took them out of the can."

In short, bless his heart. He is great.

Exciting Little Nuggets

So. Kids. What be happening.

I have had a few exciting little expurryences this past week or so. I shall expound.

Last Monday night, I went to FHE and ate part of a cookie. It was all good. We were playing Apples to Apples. I LOVE Apples to Apples. I have three 'trump' cards that are always winners if put down during my turn: Corn, Helen Keller, and the KKK.

Why? These are simply funny with pretty much anything you put them down on. Try it sometime.

So we were playing. I ate a cookie. All was good, until my mouth started tingling, which is a tell tale sign that I ate some kind of nuts.

Bad News Bears.

Why? Eating nuts puts me into Anaphilactic Shock. Basically, this means if I don't down a cubic buttload of benadryl soon, my airway cuts off and... well, yeah.

I pretty much ran out of there to my apartment, and popped a few little pink pills. However, it didn't work as quickly as it usually did, and I tarted to get faint. I called my mom, who told me I should probably go to the emergency room. Fortunately, I got a blessing from my FHE brothers, then was able to gargle with some children's liquid benadryl, which did the trick.

Yep... Hooray for not dying.

Alsoooo, I got to talk to TREY on facebook last Sunday!!
Huzzah for Abrasive BFFS!

Thus Far.

I have learned several, very important, valuable things this year at school.

1. Don't talk about advertising to a public relations professor.

2. If I don't put my hair up in my Comms class, I end up playing with my split ends instead of taking notes.

3. Cheerios never fail as a meal option.

4. Apparently, Lithuanians don't like Russians. I may have naturally, but subconsciously, inherited this.

5. Boys who have lived with a 3 year old for 3 months end up acting like a 3 year old.

6. Sneaky no-gooders, as unknowledgeable as they may be, will try to force you to eat something you're allergic to. Dagnabbit.

Elizabeth Deborah Suzanne Paulukaitis

a looong name, but.......

I HAVE A NIECE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bull Crap.

I'm sick and tired of people who claim to be my friends ignoring me.

When I was graduating High School, I had all these friends who were like, "Ohh, Erin, we'll miss you soooo much!! Don't go away to Utah!! We'll keep in touch, and hang out when you come home!"

Thats a big fat load of crap.

It just goes to show you who your real friends are.

MEANING, your real friends aren't people who attempt contact for about a month or two, then drop you out of their lives altogether. Real friends acknowledge when you're making an effort and actually RESPOND when you try to get back in contact with them, no matter how long its been. Real friends don't ignore your existence.

Thank you, Real Friends. You know who you are.

As for those of you who aren't:

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits. You are a skidmark on the Underpants of Society.

Fun Friday Nights

Tonight I went with three of the other girls from the Spanish house to volunteer as an "investigator" at the MTC. I was sort of freaked out to go at first, because I'd never gone before, but Missy convinced me to go anyways.

So we get there, and Missy ( my roommate and I) are paired together to go and chat with a companionship that is going to go to Chile in 5 weeks. It was their first time teaching in Spanish. They did pretty well, but lets just say that it was a confidence booster for me, because they made me feel really smart for knowing lots more than them. Hahaha... yes.

When we got there, we were given a 'situation' in which we were a methodist family and we had a brother who was a member and had gone to church once before. Since it was Missy and me and we were supposed to be a family, she was like, "You can be the Mom," right before the Elders walked in. I was just like, "Uhhhh... Kay!" When they came in, I was all in character, and was like, "This is my daughter! I have two more kids, They're ten and sixteen, my husband isn't in right now," making up a bunch of stuff on the spot just for fun. Hahaha... It was great. Good fun. Definitely plan on going again.

I'm kind of dying to own one of these. :)

Grosgrain: Lisa Leonard Designs GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

This jewelry is amazing... Ack I want to win one of these giveaways so badly! :(

Fingers crossed, once more.

The Book of Erin

To read the unabridged version, click here.

1 And thus verily, I sayeth unto you, She that wast from Georgia went forth unto BYU for the second time.
2 And she did have many experiences from her first year that she hath not enjoyed, and thus she desired greatly to not relive them.
3 So she went forth from the land of peaches and peanuts, and did thusly find herself in a foreign land that was within her homeland, and did speak a tongue different from her own amongst them that were with her.
4 And the new roommates did prove to be worthy of her company, and they did have many nights of tae-bo and ninja stalking to amuse them.
5 And she did cook for those within her house, and thou she wast stressed out about it, it did go forth successfully.
6 And the recipe was asked for.
7 And it came to pass that She did continue her days of schooling, learning many things in time. And she also hath enjoyed the days in which her classes were canceled for no particular reason.

Chapter 2
1 And it came to pass that Erin was approached by menfolk at BYU.
2 And it came to pass that the menfolk that approached her were rather odd.
3 And these who had approached her would say bizarre things to her and did not make good impressions.
4 And she rejected them thusly.
5 And as time went on, She hath found herself late for work.

The Most Excellent Picture taken of me in a long time

WOW

Today

Haaaapy Biiirrrrrrthdaaaaaayy toooo meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

:(

I wish sometimes that people just knew about the gospel automatically.

Its so hard to watch others in pain and not know what to say to them to make them understand.

I wish I could just make everything right. I hate seeing people like that, sad and confused and angry.

All we can do sometimes is say "I love you, I'm praying for you," and hope those prayers come true, because no one needs it more than them.

I love you buddy, and I only wish I could do more for you. You're in my thoughts and prayers. We can do this.

hungry........ yesss.

i am jonesing for some waffles or lucky charms right about now. mmm.

I know everyone's probably tired of this but...

Sew Cute Shop Amy Butler Birdie Sling GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

This freaking adorable bag is being given away. And i want it. reeeealll bad.

Musing

My friend put her facebook status as "is having a hard time planning ahead." Our other friend commented on it with what I think is a very wise statement. He said: "then dont. live each day like its your last, and if God lets you wake up the next morning, do it again."

At the moment.

So right now, I'm supposed to be writing a 12-15 minute talk on missionary work for my singles branch on Sunday. Problem is, I have little to no motivation to do so. For one thing, I've never given a talk that long before. In fact, the last time I was asked to give a talk a few years ago when my dad was bishop of our family ward, I was asked to give a talk 5 minutes long as the youth speaker, and it ended up being literally about 2 minutes, if that. And I was prepared and everything. Hahaha... yeah. So I suppose this is my first "big girl talk" as my friend puts it. I'm speaking with this other guy who is a really recently returned missionary of only a few weeks or so. I kind of feel like I ought to go aead and warn him that he may be speaking for longer than anticipated, since its nearly impossible for me to be able to fill that quota. Ha. Basically, although it is church and all, and I'm supposed to appreciate the whole experience and whatnot, my current view of the situation is simply this: SUCK.

The World

I have the most adorable nephew in the whole stinking world.

facebook excellence

So the other day me and my friends were goofing off after institute in the annex, playing basketball and stuff. I'm pretty horrible at it, so we were just messing around and my friend Kevin climbed on top of the hoop thing and told me to throw the ball "granny style" and he would get it in the basket for me. My other friend Megan apparently had a camera, and right as i bent over dramatically to chuck the ball, she snapped a picture. Right after that, she promptly told me that she had got a sweet shot of my butt. I thought it was hilarious, so she put it up on facebook. After that, some entertaining comments appeared. Here we go:

Erin Paulukaitis

BUTT

Sun at 12:45am

Braden Hansen

niceeee lol

Sun at 6:06pm

Megan P.

sicko

Sun at 6:35pm

Erin Paulukaitis

i'm just going to take it as a compliment.

Sun at 6:36pm · Delete

Wesley Kun

how sad erin...you take anything as a compliment!!!! sad sad sad and even sadder :(

11 hours ago

Kevin Yancey

you know erin i didn't even notice me in this picture at first

about a minute ago

Megan P.

gee i wonder why...

about a minute ago

Erin PaulukaitisHAHAHA
again, i"m going to take that as a compliment

Sad Beans.

Lately I've been really missing my really good friend Trey, who's on his mission in Fukuoka, Japan right now. He's been gone since March, and it feels like its already been a really long time. Wah. I just want him to appear outside my door or something. haha... or just go to Japan and show up at his. Whatever. I miss that boy. He needs to hurry up and missionize and get those two years to pass faster.

I'm channeling Julie Andrews.

These are a few of my favorite things... I got bored. Don't judge me. Enjoy.


1) Movies. I love them. some of my favorites are The Hunt for Red October, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and the Goonies.




2) Apples and peanut butter, heavy on the peanut butter. nuff said.








3) Chuck Norris. I adore this man.






4) Bubbles. Lame, maybe, but i love em.









5) LOST. I am absolutely positively obsessed with this show. If you ever hear any news about it, please tell me so i stay in the know. I could go on and on about what has happened and theories and the whole shebang. LOVE IT.

Words in the English language that I despise-- part II

The second installment of words in the English Language that I despise. A little/Lot late, but bear with me.

3) tummy-- see my explanation for belly. (shudder)

4) crush-- in the connotation of "OooOOoo, I have a crush on every boy!" It sounds painful. No me gusta.

5) puce-- as in the color. no explanation needed. especially if you've actually seen the color.

Well thats all for now kids. Enjoy.

Harry Potter... etc.

... is stellar. No lie. I adore those books and movies and almost all of their associated merchandise and whatnot. Dear JK Rowling. I heart you.

So i only have one week of work left for the summer, then I'm going on a YSA trip one weekend and then I get to go to New York with my parents and sister for a few days in early August. Then a few weeks after that I'm back to Utah for schoolish things and whatnot.

So I've been thinking a lot about what school will be like this year. Extremely different, one can only hope. I've especially been thinking about living in the FLSR... and I won't lie, I'm kinda sorta freakin out. Everytime I get to thinking about it, I go on this tangent in my mind that involves this daydream about trying to speak Spanish all the time and just... sucking at it. I know this is ridiculous, but it is insanely intimidating to consider. People tell me my Spanish is good but regardless, I'm just not as confident in it. Oh well. We'll see i guess.


In other news, I found out some interesting things about my elbow. I went to the orthopaedist the other day, since my elbow has been hurting waay badly lately. Some days I can barely move it or unbend it, let alone put any weight on it. So I went in, and told him about my break in January, then he examined it in his orthopaedist-y way, and told me that the tendons and some of the ligaments in my elbow are sore and swollen or something of the like. Apparently this is called tennis elbow... and I have it, even though I don't play tennis. Ha. So I got a brace for my arm (they actually have "tennis elbow braces") and I have to go in for physical therapy a couple times a week. It ought to be somewhat interesting. We'll see I guess.

Soooo I am a horrible friend who is horrible at writing letters to other friends in other states and countries! Ohs Noes. I need to jump on that. Seriously. If I don't get a letter to Japan soon, somebody is going to bust a cap at me, even from the other side of the world. Plus I need to send letters to Utah, Arizona, and Washington, and probably a few other places I can't think of right this moment. It has been waaaay too long since my last ones. Poo to being bad at keeping up with letters. Oh well, I'm working on it. I just despise the post office, so I'm always reluctant to go over there.

Huntspatch

We are in Huntsville, Alabama for this weekend and the Fourth of July. It is all kinds of fun and joy to be had. I am staying at my Aunt's house with her three miniature schnauzers. It is just thuper duper! I have found my camera again, so I will probably put up pictures soonish of our escapades.

Blah

So I havent really posted anything worthwhile... in a while... no pun intended. I wish I had more to say. hahaa... but really.

So What has been going on with my life lately... hmm...

Okay. So I am still working at the daycare with Wendy, and its been alright. I thought I would be more tired of it already. I worked a 7-3 shift the other day, and I would like to never have to do that again... ugh. chills. But while I was working it, Vacation Bible School was going on, and Pastor Dale who is, I suppose, technically my boss (which I find ironic, being a mormon and whatnot,) told a weird story to the kids about how we are saved only by grace, or what Jesus did for us in his sacrifice. It was super bizarre to hear, because I do not believe that at all. It made me think a little harder about what I do believe. I know that Christ died for us, and that because of that we will all be resurrected. If you want to call that being 'saved,' then I guess it kind of makes sense. But what Pastor Dale was saying was that because Jesus died for us, we are all every one of us automatically saved and make it into heaven. His words, not mine. This is where it stipos making sense to me. If we are all saved by grace only, then why do we even try in this life? He addressed that as well. He said that everytime he does what Jesus wants, like pray or go to church, it is his way of saying thank you to Jesus for saving him. As pretty as this message sounds, I just don't agree at all. yes, we will all receive a body because of what He did for us, but WE have to work and do our best to deserve it, and to make it into the Celestial Kingdom. He can't just stick us there automatically. You have to work for Celestial Glory, but it will be worth it.
I dunno. It just made me appreciate how much sense our religion makes, and how I do believe it vehemently, no matter what else someone may try to unfluence me to believe. I have faith in it, and theres not a lot you can do to shake that.

Boojiboo Flirty Apron GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Boojiboo Flirty Apron GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

This apron makes me want to cook.

Marseilles Dress SHABBY APPLE GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Marseilles Dress SHABBY APPLE GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!


i want this. really really badly.

i want that...

that is all.

Words in the English language that I despise.

I'm planning on making this a weekly sort of post.
I've discovered that there are many, many words and expressions in the English language that I simply can't stand.. they literally make me cringe saying, hearing, or even thinking about them. I will explain the word/words and my reasoning for despising them.


supper-- ugh. something just sounds wrong about this. it evokes.... ugh. just ugh.

belly-- to me this implies fatness or something gros and jiggly.



more to come soon.

Hint Hint

Due to an experience I have had the displeasure of having recently, I would just like to give a few tips to guys out there.


Asking a girl if she has a boyfriend when you met her that day, CREEPY.

Talking to a girl everytime you're on facebook, CREEPY.

Following a girl around at a party as she tries to stick to her friends and NOT sit with you and talk to you, CREEPY.

Following a girl outside as she talks on the phone, CREEPY.

Standing there and watching a girl talk on the phone for about 10 minutes, MAJORLY FREAKING CREEPY.

Not realizing when you are being creepy, and instead messaging the girl the next day and telling her about how you would 'love to see her again," once more, MAJORLY FREAKING FREAKING FREAKING CREEPY.




Let the lesson be learned. Ye who are creepy STRESS PEOPLE OUT.

Letter of Interest... hahaha

One of my friends posted this on facecbook. I think I've read it in an email before, but I just re read it and still find it hilariopus. and terribly true. Ha. Take from it what you will.


Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years, and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core™ or Dri-Weave™ absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing?

As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits from Aunt Flo. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in capri pants. Which brings me to the reason for my letter.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy Period."

Are you freaking kidding me?

What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness—actual smiling, laughing happiness—is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlúa and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreens armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For the love of God, pull your head out, man. If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your accounting department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullcrap. And that's a promise I will keep. Always.

Best,

Wendi Aarons
Austin, TX

AKEBs only the Shadow knows

That's the technical full name of the only dog I ever owned. His name stands for "Adam-Kelly-Erin-Brynna only the shadow knows," given to us when i was little, mabe 5 or something, i'm not sure, by my aunt Karen. He was a hyper little munchkin, and kind of aggressive towards others, besides us, his family, of course. Eventually we gave him back to my aunt so that she could raise him and train him better. He became a really successful agility dog, and went on to win awards and competitions and whatnot. He retired after a while, and lived with my aunt and her other 3 schnauzers. We would go and visit every year at the fourth of July in Huntsville, Alabama where we have a bunch of family, and me and my older sister usually stay with my aunt, and we would all get to see him. He did still recognize us every time, and was always sweet and affectionate towards us. He was getting to be an old fart though, and his kidneys were suffering from old age and other medical issues. The other day, I got an email from my Aunt that told us that he finally passed away. Just thought I would put a shortish post up here to commemorate him. Little Shadow, you were a booger but we loved you! :)

James

So basically my nephew is the CUTEST thing EVER. Take a gander at this video and these pictures to prove my point. :)

teefs

yep... so i got my wisdom teeth taken out this morning. they gave me a valium to take beforehand, since i get super anxious annd tend to freak myself out before a doctor's appointment or stuff like that... so by the time we actually get to the oral surgeon's office, i'm feeling pretty dang good. they take me into the room where they'll perform the whole shindig, and i'm a happy little samper, musing about whatever the heckis going on, and they pop an oxygen mask on me, hook me up with a blood pressure monitor on my left arm, along with a heart rate monitor on my right finger, then tourniquet my arm so they can stick an IV in there, which surprisingly for me, didn't really hurt at all. like, a ridiculous amount less than the classic finger prick thing they usually do at my doctor's appointments. It was... fun? i vaguely remember asking about everything in the room, like, whats that for whats this for whats that noise what does that do what do those do whats that one??? kind of deal. then they stuck some weird medicine in my IV that made my butt itch and i was OUTTTTTTTTT. It was... interesting. next thing i know i'm waking up and being told to keep my eyes open, dear. then apparently they stuck me in a wheel chair and got me out to the car, where i slept for a pleasant amount of time, even after i got home. sooooooooo yyyyyyyyyyyyyepppppppppppppppp.

PS. lortab is good. very good. i like it quite a bit.

Another excellent giveaway!

Picnic Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!
GAAAAHHH this girl's stuff is soo cute!

Grosgrain: Pleated Petal Tank ANTHROPOLIFICATION GIVEAWAY!!!!

Grosgrain: Pleated Petal Tank ANTHROPOLIFICATION GIVEAWAY!!!!

This tank top is super cute... Its crazy awesome what this girl does with fabric. I highly recommend this blog to anyone and everyone. I wish i could pull off making stuff like this! maybe some day... maybe some day...

lately

we was a'making a cake. with fondant. we're hot. don't argue.

ohh snap!!
we had a party. we danced. we ate popsicles. it was epic. it was celebratory. :D

Adding more to "The List"

19. Go to the Sundance Film Festival.
20. Go to the Cannes film festival.


...
.....
.......yep. I'm in a film-festival-going mood.

Phantom of the Opera

i just finished watching this for like, the gazillionth time.

GAH. i LOVE this movie.

random thought

i was on facebook just a lookin around, and i found that some people were talking about what song was #1 the say they were born. out of curiosity, i went on and looked up what mine would be.

the result: "If Wishes Came True" by Sweet Sensation.

hmm. excellent.

in case you'd like to know, here is the link to the website i used:

http://www.joshhosler.biz/NumberOneInhistory/selectMonth.htm

List

soo.... i got bored. and got to musing. and i decided to make this random list of things i want to do before i die. or whatever. yup.

1. go skydiving
2. learn how to ballroom dance
3. live in seattle
4. go to paris, france
5. go to barcelona, spain
6. help build a habitat for humanity house
7. write a book
8. take a cake decorating class
9. learn how to play the banjo
10. get a dog
11. name that dog "Waffle."
12. see 10 plays on Broadway
13. get married
14. graduate college
15. own a restaurant/ bakery... perhaps when i am old and gray
16. learn to speak Lithuanian
17. go to Vilnius, Lithuania
18. ride a motorcycle

yep... pretty random i guess. oh well. haha... i figured 18 was good for now, same number as my age. more to come-- enjoy!

The Vocabulary of the Erin.

I use certain words to describe certain things.

I have intensely rational reasons for all of these.

Some are made up, some are commonplace, but all are completely legitimate. Or as I prefer, Legit. Which they are.

Buttload: A large amount of something.

Cubic Buttload: An extraordinarily large buttload of something.

Douche, and all of its variations, 'like such as' douche, douchebag douchetastic, douchey, etc etc.

Douchecake: This one is set apart from the rest, as it is a special brand of insult. It is a careful combination of the words "douchebag" and "fruitcake." As much as I would love to take credit for the creation of this word, I cannot. Though I am eternally grateful for he who did.

Fruitbag: ..............eh. Just kidding about this one. It doesn't seem to work as well the other way around.

"For shiz lagit:" Pronounced "fore shi[z] lag-it." Not 'legit.' 'Lagit.' Generally used to express Astounding reactions to something that has occurred.

i.e. "He did whaaaaat last Thursday? For shiz lagit?"

"I don't know nothing bout birthing babies." Commonly expressed by Erin in the place of simply saying "I don't know." Famous quote from "Gone with the Wind." Generally expressed monotonously, accompanied by a deadpan look.

"Shut the front door!" Used as a substitute for a similarly close phrase, to express indignation.

uppindates

so... news time!!

I got into the FLSR Spanish House for next year! Woo! My application and interview went really well, and it feels good to know of my plans for sure for next year. Plus I am crazy excited, and the more i hear about it from other people the more excited I get... yay! This is something I've wanted for a while, probably longer than a lot of people know. I almost applied at the beginning of school, before i even picked heritage or freshman academy or had any plans. I definitely wanted to live there for sure, no doubt, after this year. So yeah, finally making it a reality is a big freakin deal. :D

Otherwise... no huge news. I've had an excellent week so far (knock on wood) grades wise and also just in general for the most part. So, we'll see what the rest holds. :)

La vida a este punto

I've come to a decision about something. Somethings, actually.

I am through with trying to be something I'm not. A year ago, I would never have let things get like this. I feel like I have changed as a person in many ways, not all of them beneficial to myself. I don't like that I've felt pressure to be different than I actually am just because of what others say or might think.
I was a very strong individual. I didn't let others mold me into whatever they wanted. Peer pressure was not even on the radar as an issue.
Now, I can feel a difference in myself. Now, I stand back and let others run the reigns. Now, I let myself be convinced of so many things. One of those being how to act and think.
I am through with this.
I'm standing up for myself again, like I did before. I'm tired of having to defend myself when I didn't even do anything that needs defending. And those who think I have, obviously don't know me as well as they think.

Basically, I've learned that I know what is best for me. Friends are hard to make, but they're not worth changing yourself for. The point is that they accept you as who you are.

I genuinely do believe that there is a reason for everything.

I thought I might go ahead and put out what my current plans are for next year. I'm applying for the Foreign Language Speaking Student Residence on campus, hopefully speaking Spanish. I've heard great things about it from my brother and my sister-in-law, including that people there are just different from others at BYU. Generally more tolerant and social, for example.



By the Way, I got my cast off last Tuesday!!! Now I can move my arm again. Well, relatively. Te muscles atrophied, so it'll take a couple weeks to get them stretched back out to their full length and strength again. So we'll see.

Hahas

I went to humor U tonight with my friend Spencer. It was really funny, a good show. There was one part, at the end, that was sort of ironic... So pretty much the best guy they saved for last, and He came up to the stage and was talking about watching people fall while walking across campus. As soon as he mentioned that, all of my friends looked right at me... then he said something about watching some girl fall down one day, and everyone was like, oooh was that you?? unfortunately, from what he said just after that, no it was not me who had fallen around him. That would have been a little bit too magnificent. haha.

story time!

so you kids better all read this, because it took me forever to type one handed.

Yesterday morning, I was walking to my archaeology class in the snow, and, being the ridiculously clumsy person I am, I of course slipped and fell on my butt. I pretty much just hard core biffed it right in front of like, 50 people walking to class too. Some guy next to me freaked out and tried to come over to help me up, but practically fell over himself. I was just like, "I'm fine, I'm fine" and stood up and kept going on my way, but really, reeeeeally slowl, cuz i thought it was a definite possibility that i would pass out right then and there. I ended up sitting through two classes before I realized that my arm felt really stiff and I couldn't bend it at all.

So i ended up going to the doctor and he told me it was either a ligament, tendon, or fracture, and sent me over to the hospital to get an x ray. Turns out that two of the bones that come together in my elbow are broken.

THEN I got to go to a clinic today to get casted, since theres a lot of fluid and whatnot building up in my joint. It goes from my palm to the middle of my upper arm, and it already itches like crazy. Ugh.

I did, however, name it Henry.

People Watching

Just thought I would share a lil experience I had in my class this morning. So, there are actually more guys than girls in that class, which is obviously something that most of us wouldn’t mind, so many times I will end up sitting in between two different guys; these tend t be good days on my part. Haha.

Anyways, so I went in today and sat in the same general spot as I normally do, the back row against the wall, and I pulled out my computer as per usual. Of course, relatively soon after, a guy came up and asked if he could sit next to me. I said yeah, sure, go for it. Not long after that another guy sat on my other side. About 20 minutes or so into the class, the first guy sneezed. He covered his face, of course—with his hands. And, unfortunately, there was a bit of side-spray—onto my hands and my computer keyboard.It was all I could do to keep from hurling.

I started kind of subtly observing what this guy was doing all class, and the more I saw, the more I was grossed out. He would reach up behind his shirt on his back and scratch, really loudly and grossly, and he sat there with his mouth open the whole time. The whole time. I about barfed. And, to top it all of, I looked over at one point, and noticed that he had a hard core sick-nasty ‘raper stache.’

He did, however, smell pretty good. I have to grant him that at least.

People amuse me. I am certainly a people watcher.

words

I findthat there are a lot of words in the English language that I am not particularly fond of. Some are obvious, such as "chunks," "panties," and "belly," but another word that I pretty much hate is the word "crush" and everything that is associated with a particular use of that word.


I really hate when people use the word "crush" to describe liking someone. Okay, so here are my reasons:

1. We are in college, people. Forgive me, but 'crush' sounds kind of middle school to me.

2. That word obviously doesn't have the best connotations. Come on. 'Crush?' Somethings not gonna turn out well for someone.

3. If one used that word often, and if, I don't know, maybe the person being 'crushed on' learned of this, I just don't think it would end up well. Being liked is one thing, 'crushed on' is another.
I think it shows immaturity that someone can't even use the word 'like,' even if it supposedly means the same thing.

Ugh. Pet peeves.

Chuck Norris

So, I am pretty much addicted to Chuck Norris jokes. And i also happen to use the word "intense" a lot. SO, this morning, I opened up my igoogle homepage, and I have a "Chuck Norris Fact Generator" on it, and this is what it told me today:

Every time someone uses the word "intense", Chuck Norris always replies "you know what else is intense?" followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.

The Prologue to "The Rover" by Aphra Behn

PROLOGUE,
Written by a Person of Quality.

WITS, like Physicians, never can agree,
When of a different Society;
And Rabel’s Drops were never more cry’d down
By all the Learned Doctors of the Town,
Than a new Play, whose author is unknown:
Nor can those Doctors with more Malice sue
(And powerful Purses) the dissenting Few,
Than those with an insulting Pride do rail
At all who are not of their own Cabal.
If a Young Poet hit your Humour right,
You judge him then out of Revenge and Spite;
So amongst Men there are ridiculous Elves,
Who Monkeys hate for being too like themselves:
So that the Reason of the Grand Debate,
Why Wit so oft is damn’d, when good Plays take,
Is, that you censure as you love or hate.
Thus, like a learned Conclave, Poets sit
Catholick Judges both of Sense and Wit,
And damn or save, as they themselves think fit.
Yet those who to others Faults are so severe,
Are not so perfect, but themselves may err.
Some write correct indeed, but then the whole
(Bating their own dull Stuff i’th’ Play) is stole:
As Bees do suck from Flowers their Honey–dew,
So they rob others, striving to please you.
Some write their Characters genteel and fine,
But then they do so toil for every Line,
That what to you does easy seem, and plain,
Is the hard issue of their labouring Brain.
And some th’ Effects of all their Pains we see,
Is but to mimick good Extempore.
Others by long Converse about the Town,
Have Wit enough to write a leud Lampoon,
But their chief Skill lies in a Baudy Song.
In short, the only Wit that’s now in Fashion
Is but the Gleanings of good Conversation.
As for the Author of this coming Play,
I ask’d him what he thought fit I should say,
In thanks for your good Company to day:
He call’d me Fool, and said it was well known,
You came not here for our sakes, but your own.
New Plays are stuffed with Wits, and with Debauches,
That croud and sweat like Cits in May–day Coaches.

tidbits

We ought to be conscious of other people’s feelings.

Jumping to assumptions is a stupid, stupid thing to do.

To “assume” makes an ass out of “u and me.”

Immaturity is a bad excuse for you to tell yourself about someone just because you think you are in the right.

Why don’t you try thinking a little bit harder next time? It might do ya some good.

What High School Musical 2 has taught us

This is an email that my friend got. You have to have seen the movie to get them all, but they are frankly hilarious.


1. If you wish to show your inability or dislike for dancing, it's perfectly reasonable to break out in a dance number
2. College? It's not important, as long as you can hang out with your friends
3. If your love is strong enough, fireworks will go off, and lanterns will fly away as you and your boyfriend kiss
4.Playing sports is a hint that it's time to break into song
5.Don't worry about being rude/mean because in the end things will work out for you
6.School spirit is a must. Especially during the summer
7. Your friends are not human and should always be addressed by the name of their school mascot
8. Yes! You can paint your locker pink!Screw the school board
9. You can be a chef, lifeguard, or golf assistant...no experience needed
10. A guy can never wear too much bronzer
11. Lakes are the equilivant of mirrors. They can show your reflection perfectly
12. It is possible to memorize a 3 minute song over the course of 30 seconds...and sing it perfectly
13.It doesn't matter that you're not a staff member... You can still attend any and all staff events
14.The phrase 'more moves than an octopus in a wrestling match' is something that can be used in everyday conversation
15. There are two bells that get you out of school. The first one tells you to start singing and dancing, the second announces you should stop
16.Even though its the last day of school, its ok to leave stuff in the locker for the summer
17.If your family is 'saving pennies' for your college education and gives you a junky truck to drive because they 'can't afford anything else', it is normal for their kitchen to have expensive granite counter tops and a $7,000 fridge
18. Pianos can float now. Go ahead, try it
19. It's perfectly acceptable for a guy to wear girl's capris
20. If you're upset, just run through a golf course, jumping and spinning, while singing 'Bet on it'...you won't fall at any point, and no one will stop and think 'what the heck?'
21.You can send telepathic messages to your mom to tell her to pick you up just as you're finishing your breakup song with your boyfriend
22. A resort can be highly successful when there are way more employees than guests
23.'And she stepped on the ball' is actually quite funny. You just need to put it into context
24.One family can apparently control an entire city, including all educational institutions in the area
25. It's good manners to refer to your mother as a 'back stabber'
26. Turkey imported from Maine is much better than any other turkey. In fact, it's fabulous... 27 .Apparently, it is now possible to hire an entire high school to be the staff at an upscale country club
28.Iced tea from England is blue
29. Water Bug is a really cute, funny, and romantic pet name. (gag me)
30. Being a teenage paparazzi at school and taking multiple pictures of the same two people is not weird or creepy in any way
31.It is okay to try to grope your girlfriend if she's leaving you, even though you guys have never kissed before
32.When your girlfriend tells you that your shoes don't match your tie, you must do a stupid looking surfer move to see if she's right, you can't just look down
33.When you frolic with your girlfriend in the golf course, you get in trouble. When you frolic by yourself and sing, nothing happens
34.It IS possible to have any object in the world come in pink & engraved with your initials
35.If you are the basketball star of your school, you can get yourself, as well as the rest of the school, summer jobs
36. Lava Springs apparently had no employees, since they had to hire a whole new staff
37. Don't change your friends, change your dreams
38.Corbin Bleu switched shampoos. Because his hair obviously did not have as much shine, bounce, or body as it did in HSM 1
39. Even though Chad danced in 'Get your head in the game', 'Status Quo' and 'What time is it', he apparently does not dance, according to the song 'I don't dance'
40. 'What team?' 'Wildcats!' 'GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME!' Can fix any problem
41. Basketball scholarships at the University of Albuquerque depend completely on your musical performance skills
42. Guitars and speaker equipment can be placed near a pool safely
43.Take two small saucepan lids and bang them together. You'll find they make the exact same sound as a large GONG. Go on, have a go,

Class

So I wrote this while sitting in my Theater History class, in which we were talking about historiology, which is the idea that the way an event is recorded or written down is just as important, if not more important than the event itself. We got into a discussion about the news and the way it is presented and the different spins that different people and stations place on the same news tidbits, sometimes changing the event entirely. The professor concluded that this is comparable to someone from our day going to speak with someone from Shakespeare’s time, because the “language of intelligibility” is vastly different. It made me think, huh, I should probably watch more news. But it also got me thinking about my major, pre-communications. The more that I paid attention in the class I realized that I really have chosen a good major for myself. I just find that sort of thing, concerning communications and perspective, crazy fascinating, and to be honest I could probably talk about that kind of thing all day long

Another funny note was when we were talking about differences of perspective, and one girl mentioned how she and her roommates saw mamma mia, but when it was over she thought it wasn’t very good because some people couldn’t sing or act, but her roommates were absolutely in love with it. She referenced Pierce Brosnan, and our professor just stopped and looked at her with a smile, and replied, “I don’t care if he can sing or not.” Needless to say, there was a lot of laughter, and she received a rousing round of applause.

Another funny thing one of my professors said: ON the first day of my mass communications calss, my professor made a comment which he considered very funny. "Television is just a media box for couch potatoes."

yeah, late. suck it up.

My initial intentions when I started writing this were to do the first real post on the first of January You know, the whole resolutions, new year thing and whatnot? False. I am lazy. So I waited until I got back to Utah from Georgia and now, two days into classes, am finally writing. Yay punctuality.

I was just thinking about something today, about how first impressions can kind of suck. Yeah, some people say they are very important in a person's judgement of another, but I don't think they should be. I used ot be really into first impressions, but after several experiences where my first impression of someone has turned out to be a total bust, I've definitely learned. Haha. I think we ought to make a genuine hard core effort to learn more about someone before we pass judgement, especially if that is being made purely on first impressions.

Random Note: I decided that my favorite song of all time in "Such Great Heights" by the Postal Service. It's beat and tune are kind of different from what i usually gravitate to, but the words of this song kind of smack me upside the face and 'pull at my heartstrings' if you will. Here is the first chunk of lyrics:

I am thinking its a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned.
I have to speculate that God himself did make us into sorresponding shapes, like puzzle pieces from a play.
True, it may seem like a stretch, but its thoughts like this that catch my troubled head when you're away, when I am missing you tonight.
When you're out there on the road for several weeks at shows, and when you scan the radio I hope this song will guide you.

:D