I've come to a decision about something. Somethings, actually.
I am through with trying to be something I'm not. A year ago, I would never have let things get like this. I feel like I have changed as a person in many ways, not all of them beneficial to myself. I don't like that I've felt pressure to be different than I actually am just because of what others say or might think.
I was a very strong individual. I didn't let others mold me into whatever they wanted. Peer pressure was not even on the radar as an issue.
Now, I can feel a difference in myself. Now, I stand back and let others run the reigns. Now, I let myself be convinced of so many things. One of those being how to act and think.
I am through with this.
I'm standing up for myself again, like I did before. I'm tired of having to defend myself when I didn't even do anything that needs defending. And those who think I have, obviously don't know me as well as they think.
Basically, I've learned that I know what is best for me. Friends are hard to make, but they're not worth changing yourself for. The point is that they accept you as who you are.
I genuinely do believe that there is a reason for everything.
I thought I might go ahead and put out what my current plans are for next year. I'm applying for the Foreign Language Speaking Student Residence on campus, hopefully speaking Spanish. I've heard great things about it from my brother and my sister-in-law, including that people there are just different from others at BYU. Generally more tolerant and social, for example.
By the Way, I got my cast off last Tuesday!!! Now I can move my arm again. Well, relatively. Te muscles atrophied, so it'll take a couple weeks to get them stretched back out to their full length and strength again. So we'll see.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
I went to humor U tonight with my friend Spencer. It was really funny, a good show. There was one part, at the end, that was sort of ironic... So pretty much the best guy they saved for last, and He came up to the stage and was talking about watching people fall while walking across campus. As soon as he mentioned that, all of my friends looked right at me... then he said something about watching some girl fall down one day, and everyone was like, oooh was that you?? unfortunately, from what he said just after that, no it was not me who had fallen around him. That would have been a little bit too magnificent. haha.