Monday, November 28, 2011

Sometimes life really sucks.

Sometimes, You just have one of those weekends that could have been great, but ends up sucking miserably once Monday comes around.

I'm feeling terribly stressed out and on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

I need a way to calm the heck down and get out of the stress of school and work and insensitive people and everything combining all into one.

Not to mention, Goober died this weekend. I cried.

I really do think that Optimus misses him. They were always crawling around next to each other, and i think they had a brotherly bond of sorts. They always, and I mean literally ALWAYS, slept next to each other during the day. When I would bring them out and put them on the ground, they would crawl away but then back towards each other. Optimus came out a little slower when I took him out yesterday, and seemed almost resigned to crawl around on my hand. He kept crawling up next to me and nudging against my hand when I would place him on the ground until I would pick him up again. He crawled up my arm to my shoulder just to sit and watch, burrowing into my hair. It was tender and sad. I put him back on my hand to put him back in the tank, but he gripped onto my hand and clamped down on it with his little legs, not pinching, just refusing. When I coaxed him off, he immediately crawled into the corner next to Ninja, my roommate's crab, and scurried over and around him, settling down with their shells touching, just like he and Goober used to sleep.

 It might seem stupid to some people, but I really do love my hermit crabs. They are my pets, and my babies, and whatever. They may not be like a dog or a cat to you, but they are special to me in their own way and I really care about them.

I want to be done with school. I want to not worry about passing grades and tests and group projects and research papers and assignments and whatever else. I only have one semester left after this and I only want to get through it. But I'm awful at coping with stress and anger and frustration and stress and more stress.

I need a breath.

Friday, November 18, 2011

An unconventionally serious post.

A blog that I personally generally have had a great trust in, that tends to promote good causes and great messages to women in the community recently recommended I subscribe to something called "One Million Moms." I was vaguely interested, and decided to sign up for their mailing list without really checking out the website entirely, trusting the judgement of the person that recommended it to me. I knew they wouldn't constantly spam me, promising an email about once a month-- pretty liberal and not at all stifling by normal means.

I got an email from them a little while later, and decided to read it and see what the promoters were urging their readers to speak out about. After reading it, I was severely disappointed. It was all about how the fact that there was a gay teenager portrayed on a popular (and, i'll acknowledge it, stupid,) teen tv drama. The "moms" behind this organization seem to believe that because they weren't wholeheartedly condemning the character's actions, that the TV show was actually promoting children to come out as gay and actually CONVINCE them that they ARE homosexual even if they don't associate themselves as such. A completely RIDICULOUS!! accusation. Here is a quote from that email itself:

The Trevor Helpline promotion aired during the "Beat It" episode of Teen Nick's Degrassi series when teen Riley, the openly gay football captain and starting quarterback, declined reparative therapy for his homosexuality. Not only is Teen Nick now featuring a show that encourages the nation's youth to embrace alternate lifestyles, but the family retail chain Target Corporation is helping through sponsorship.... They are openly recruiting teens and children to become 'gay' on a program that also promotes the transgender and homosexual lifestyle.

I'm sorry, but I just think this is about the stupidest thing for them to say. Now I know that not everyone would agree with me, but it sounds to me like the women behind OMM are promoting some seriously bigoted and destructive ideas themselves. They are promoting the idea that if someone think differently, that there is something fundamentally wrong with them, and are practically trying to tell these people to hate themselves for the thoughts they are having. Even if you don't agree with their "alternative lifestyle," there has got to be a better way to come at and help them other than just saying that it is wrong. I don't see that is is going to really accomplish anything for that individual, and that type of behavior will probably make you more enemies than friends.

I unsubscribed from OMM today. Some of their issues are valid and noble, I acknowledge that. But there are others that are simply killjoy, like the attempt to remove the Ben and Jerry's "Schweddy Balls" flavor from stores, and completely unnecessary. Others are simply too judgmental and bigoted for me to feel like I can give any support to. I'll respect anyone that does, I just don't want to sign my name to something I just cannot agree with.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Uhhhh. Thank you?

Yesterday, two men told me that they want me to have their babies.

Well, one asked me very matter of factly, "Will you be the mother of my children?"

I responded. "Okay, sure."

So apparently I'm going to be having these men's babies one day.

Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhh. We'll see about that.

Hey, whatever. I'll just take it as a compliment. Curse these child-bearing hips of mine. Or something.

Monday, November 14, 2011

I have a weird desire to dye my hair pink.

Just like these chicks.

Hmmm. Maybe someday.

You know what one of my very favorite things is?

When I get a new shirt, and I wash it without looking at the care label, and then it shrinks in the dryer.

THAT. Is one of my VERY favorite things.



Friday, November 11, 2011

Aw, poo.

I feel like a ninny.

I read a lot of blogs. I have a lot of free time when work is not busy to read blogs. Don't judge me, ok?

Well, I really like reading other people's vintage/fashion/accesory/DIY/sewing/craftypants blogs. Yet I don't do any of these things myself.

I am a facsimile of a sham.


I really do enjoy reading those people's blogs, but they make me look at the outfit I chose for the day and I end up thinking things like:

" Oops. These pants are a size too big.

Is it really business casual if I throw on a skirt with this band t-shirt?

I guess I'll wear my hair straight today......... again.

Good heavens. I own about 500 t-shirts. "

I used to think that I don't have any style at all. But then I realized, I do have a sense of style. It's called t-shirts and jeans. And as lame and boring as that may be, that's what I wear, because its what I feel comfortable in.

Now my sunday clothes, what I wear to church-- now THAT is a different story. I have a certain affinity for 5-inch heels and quirky dresses. Sundays are where I get interesting.

Maybe some day these blogs will inspire me to actually do something intersting with my clothes. Maybe someday.

And then I'll remember how much I like that spiderman tee, and those ripped up too-big jeans, and I'll end up right back here.

In the comfy zone.

You know, I think I'm okay with that.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Nope, stop it. I'm not ready yet.

Listen, over eager people of the world.

I am NOT READY for Christmas yet.

It was just hardly Halloween a week ago. How can you possibly with any good conscience already be eager to throw yourselves into the Holiday season? What about the other Holidays? Like, oh, I don't know, THANKSGIVING?!

I hear ya, You think its hard to get excited for Thanksgiving. False. Let me build you up here with


1. Food. Holy cow, this one's obvious. EVERYONE freaking loves food. I know I do. Even on the occasions I forget to eat, once I do, I remember how much I love food. And Thanksgiving is basically all about food. What's not to like?

2. Black Friday. I know you all look forward to this. Every single terrifying Wal-Mart patron across the nation looks forward to this day with a voracious and upsetting determination that they carry with them into the store as they stampede through the doors at 4 in the morning. That kind of excitement is fairly contagious, its true. Oh, and Cyber Monday. You know-- the monday after Thanksgiving, when everything online goes on ridiculous sales. Oh, you didn't know about this? Well, you're welcome. You now have access to kajillions of wunderbar deals via the internets. You owe me.

3. Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade!!!! HOLY COW I AM SO PUMPED FOR THIS ASKLGJEWHOSDNFVRGJK. I kid you not. I have watched this parade every year for I cannot tell you how many years. Possibly since I was born. I don't know. Ask my mom. But I freaking love the Parade. The Broadway numbers, the random popstars, the freakin huge balloons... Whats not to like? Its stinking wonderful, and like, 50% of why I love Thanksgiving.

4. Traditions. I look forward to my family's Thanksgiving traditions every year! Like, we always go see a movie on Thanksgiving. My Dad brings up the Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving. The Holiday decorations get chunked up all around our house. Even though I'm in Utah, I still find a way to participate in the bidness of traditions. Two years ago, when I was in Utah for Thanksgiving, I went with my great aunt to a movie on Thanksgiving night, and then proceeded to spend the whole next day making tons of paper snowflakes so I could decorate my apartment to be all festive-like. Traditions are pretty much the best thing, um, ever, no matter whether or not you're in close proximity to your family all the time. You can bet I'll be working that, even though I'll be here for Thanksgiving.

5. Family!! Thanksgiving is ALL about da fambly! I adore it! Whether I'm at home in GA, or out here in Mormonland, I still love spending Thanksgiving with family. That could be my own immediate family, or my mom's aunts and uncles and cousins, or my roommate's family, (who are virtually family to me at this point) but either way, Its good times had by all.

6. IT IS NOT CHRISTMAS YET. If there's one thing I learned from the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade for years upon years, its that the Christmas season doesn't officially start until Santa Claus appears on his little sleigh and reindeer and junk at the VERY END of the parade. The END of it. COME ON. Respect the tradition and wait it out, kids. Christmas isn't too far away, that may be true. But just have patience, and you will get your time. Until then, enjoy your Turkey Day. For it is much, much closer in the future. Give the bird a chance.