Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Why should you vote for the Grizzly Bear?

1. Grizzly Bear is not a panda, or from Kenya. There is no debate about Grizzly Bear's nationality. Grizzly is 100% American fierce.

2. Grizzly Bear believes in some degree of Anarchy, so you can work out your own problems.

3. If you are unable to work out your problems, Grizzly Bear is happy to declare Martial Law, then maul you and your problems away.

4. Grizzly Bear does not believe in money or debt. Grizzly Bear only believes in fish. And pain.

5. Grizzly Bear will eat terrorism.

6. Grizzly Bear is not affiliated with any particular political party. Therefore, Grizzly Bear= Better than any other dumb bucket candidate.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The Grizzly Bear for Office Campaign Begins!

As we work harder on the Grizzly Bear for Office Campaign, please feel free to add your own Grizzly Bear Propaganda posters, or take one of these and add it to your website or blog to show your support for Grizzly Bear 2012!

Monday, November 15, 2010

Grizzly Bear for Office 2012

My dear elder brother Adam posted a link to a video a while ago, demonstrating how Christine O'Donnell doesn't know the constitution or something.

I don't really like getting political. But I'm going to get BEARY political here for a moment today.

Amidst the debating and arguing and observing over what the woman who "Is Not a Witch" said and did during this debate with her opponent, I made a few observations and suggestions of my own. For example:

Erin i don't like either one here. i think they are both trying to make personal jabs at one another here.
stupid politics. let's just all elect a panda bear. everyone loves those.

Adam As long as the panda bear is not endorsed by Sarah Palin I'm all for your proposal.

Come to think of it, I do have an opinion. I think that a panda bear would not be the wisest choice for a U.S. political office, on accounta the panda bear's nationality would probably be questioned, and we don't want no drama. So, we should ...probably elect a grizzly bear instead, who will then declare marshal law, because thats what grizzly bears do, then we can all duke it out like civilized folk did back in the olden days.
I knew a grizzly bear would be a safe bet, because a Kodiak Bear would most likely be endorsed by Sarah Palin, and we certainly can't have that, now can we.

So On that note, ladies and gentlemen, I propose for you a new candidate.

Grizzly Bear for Office, 2012

Stay Tuned to the Turtle Belt for more information on this exciting new candidate.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Look, I'm studying.

and I'm SOOOOOOO happy about it.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Life Goals.

People ask me,

Erin, What are you going to do for your future? What do you hope to be doing in [X] number of years? What are your goals? At the end of your life, where do you want to be?

I've thought long and hard about these questions, and I have an answer.

I aspire to, one day, be an old fart, sitting on my front porch in a rocking chair, stroking one of my many cats, chasing away those girl scouts attempting to sell their pesky cookies.

Aaaaaannnnnddd..... That's about it.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

6 Reasons why You shouldn't be listening to Christmas Music right now.

(at least, not for a little while.)

Dear girl sitting across from me at work.

I hate you.

Why do I hate you?

You have Pandora streaming Christmas music on your computer right now.

You say you've been patient. You say you've waited long enough to start up your festivities.

Let me tell you something--I have a few really good reasons why you should NOT be listening to Christmas music right now.

1. Halloween was, uh, 4 days ago. It should be illegal to be able to change holiday moods so quickly, to go from 'spooky creepy ghosties death etc' to 'happy joy snowflakes holly presents Santa' in such a bi-polar manner.

2. Everyone knows that the Christmas season doesn't start until Santa Claus finishes off the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade every year. DUH.

3. We haven't even had Thanksgiving yet! Stop trying to shove Holidays in my face!! We haven't even been given time to enjoy the last one yet! Some of us just aren't as ready to jump head first into the next round of decorating and themed foods.

4. I haven't even THOUGHT about buying Christmas presents yet. You're making me feel inadequate. Which makes me angry. Which makes me want to punch you in the face. Therefore:
You + Christmas Music=My Fist x Your Face. That's math, and therefore irrefutable.

5. Fortunately for you, we as citizens of the U.S. have this whole free-speech deal thing going on. So yeah, listen to your junk if you have to. But as with any type of music, at least have the common courtesy to put your headphones in. That's what everyone else is doing. What makes you better? If I took my headphones out right now and forced you to listen to the 'Red Jumpsuit Apparatus' track I have on repeat right now, you wouldn't appreciate it, now would you? Its the same basic concept.

And Finally, The Most Unarguable reason of all: