Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Well, if we're being completely honest.

I do not like Coldplay. So sue me.

I like to try to fit myself into awkward and unusual spaces whenever possible. For example, last night: my laundry basket. In the past: under the sink, inside a cabinet, behind a TV, in my storage bins, in a linen closet.

I think that half a cupcake and diet coke constitute a perfectly functional and acceptable breakfast/lunch/dinner.

Sometimes I leave bobby pins in my pockets, then can't find them, then accuse people of stealing them, then do my laundry and find 50 of them in the lint filter.

People that sing while they have their headphones on make me want to deliver unto them a swift kick to the shins.

I like to pull all my hair down so that the majority of it hangs in my face on days that I don't feel pretty.

I'm one of those people that sometimes pretends to talk on the phone so that I don't have to talk to the people around me.

I have this theory, that every time someone grows a mullet, a chupacabra is born.

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