Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Words I didn't say, but probably should have.

I was thinking just the other day about Men.

You know, its funny. I don't think I really know a whole lot of "Men." Or, at least, DATE a lot of "Men." Boys, yes. Men, not so much.

I think you catch my drift.

Without further ado, Here are a few things that I wish I had said, but didn't, to guys that I have dated in the past.

Each comment belongs to a different guy, in no particular order.


"Unless you have some kind of larynx issue, stop clearing your throat so much. It makes you sound pretentious."

"WHAT do you even WANT?!"

"Buddy, You're the one who made things awkward. I was fine, I am fine. I told you so, I don't know why you didn't believe me. Stop feeding that ego of yours, and quit t
alking to my friends about it instead of me."

"Don't you judge me for watching Desperate Housewives........ or the Jersey Shore...... or Teen Mom......... or that. No no. Don't do it."

"So. The way you kiss. ...yeah, that's gross."

"No offense, but I would prefer not to know about those... "personal issue" medical procedures you had... ahem. That, my friend, is your own bidness. Nooo thanks."

"Well... THAT was stupid."

1 comment:

Kaisha said...

Hahahaha this is great! I love writing little comments in anon. I usually keep them to myself, I don't really have the lady balls to say them out loud. But I love this! All those guys sound like idiots. Glad they are past suitors.

I love this little blog of yours. So sad to read about you loss as well!

Stop by and say hi sometime :)