Thursday, July 22, 2010

And the magic fades.

Sometimes, there are things that just lose their sheen over time. They seem pretty and shiny and appealing and awesome, but after a while their appeal starts to fade and you find yourself uninterested. Let me illustrate this for you with some examples:

1. Leather

2. Stainless steel kitchen appliances

3. Fresh Flowers

4. 'Apple' products

5. Boys from freshman year

6. Fashion trends

7. Various types of cheese

Some of these are self explanatory; kitchen appliances can only be so good for so long before they are simply counter decorations that once made quesadillas; leather gets worn and weathered and loses that appealing smell; fresh flowers can't exactly stay fresh forever, before they wilt and turn a sad shade of brown; fashion trends are in one day and out the next, never to return again (may reference, the mullet, brightly colored spandex, bonnets, etc.) There is simply no hope for Apple brand products, since that darned Steve Jobs comes up with a new version of his last product every stinking day, thereby outdating and making obsolete the $500 whatever-it-is you just purchased the day before. Cheese, if left alone and unconsumed, will turn green and moldy and chunky; and I don't care WHO you are, bleu cheese is a terrifyingly unnatural thing, and I for one don't plan on eating mold anytime in the future.

Oh, and boys from my Freshman year will never again appear as appealing to me.


Okay, so maybe I threw that one in there. But let me explain, and for those of you FROM my freshman year who may be reading this (and I do doubt you're out there), don't judge me until I've completed my case.

Freshman year, I lived in the dorms on campus, in Heritage Halls. We had two girl buildings and a guy's building in our ward, so already the "prey," if you will, was scarce, which automatically made it more desirable. The menfolk already had the one up on us; let alone when we would inherit an RM or older guy, he would be pursued and flirted with relentlessly by the "vulture girls," as we called them amongst ourselves.

Vulture Girls are those type that go after practically every guy in sight that is slightly attractive, and that they think they could ever in a million years possibly go on a date/make out with. AKA, give them an inch and they will take a mile.

So being a vulnerable 17-18 year old girl in my first year of college, in a strange new land, surrounded by strange new people in a strange new culture, naturally I also was attracted to the same boys that everyone else was attracted to, if not for the sole reason that other people were attracted to them... if that makes any sense at all. And I think it does.

I was facebook stalking some people from my freshman year the other night, just checking up on tabs and whatnot (because, as we know, I am a creeper.) I stumbled upon some guys that I never actually became facebook friends with.

Now I remember that some of these guys were like, Grade A meat back in the day. And by back in the day, I mean about two years ago.

Yet now, as I look at them, and I look at their little facebook pictures, I can't help but go, Dang. What was so great about him?

And at the risk of sounding harsh, the longer I looked at them, the less attractive they became.

And hey, that happens in life. That fancy new toaster oven was replaced with an even shinier microwave, the flock of seagulls hairdo opted out for the Bobby Brady comeback, and that new ipod you just got will probably look like trash in a year.

And those boys you lusted after as a teenager are going to look bad after a while.

And yes, I DID just compare men to toaster ovens.

Hey, I'm not judgemental. Its just nature.


Tiffy J. said...

toaster ovens are more reliable than men. just throwing that out there.

Brittani said...

haha. Do you remember the one kid that used the word pterodactyl instead of vulture. haha awesome.

Also. Freshman year. So over-rated. Haha

That creepy kid story (the kid from Australia or whatever) still creeps me out. But makes me laugh at the same time.